172 ~ Comfort Zone

 By Kay Heitsch

I've met some interesting people in my life who have been through some situations that took them out of their comfort zones.

One guy I met told me that after he had a heart attack, he saw life in a totally different way. He said he started noticing things he had never paid attention to before.

I certainly remember how I saw life in a new way after Todd died. It seems strange how, after we are taken out of our comfort zones, we somehow have our eyes opened to what's really important.

I don't like being taken out of my comfort zone, but I've learned that even when I am, God has a way of opening my eyes to things I've never noticed before.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

171 ~ Sowing and Reaping

By Kay Heitsch

Yesterday, I was certainly reaping encouragement as I received so many loving reactions and comments on Todd's Heavenly Birthday. Thank you so very much.

I thought about sowing and reaping when I remembered going to one of Eli's baseball games. I guess I was sowing that day.

I was really excited watching the baseball game. It didn't matter to me who was up to bat or out in the field. I found myself yelling, "Good eye," "What a catch," "Great swing," "Wow, what a hit!" etc., etc.

As I was all into the game, a lady looked over at me and asked, "Are you with our team?" I looked over at our daughter, Shannon, and asked her, "Are we with this woman's team?" Shannon grinned and shook her head, "No."

I smiled and answered the lady, "I guess not, but you have to know me; I like to give encouragement to all of the kids."

I can see I was sowing encouragement that day, and now yesterday I was reaping encouragement.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

170 ~ Healing Balm of Love

By Kay Heitsch

When your child dies, you live with a broken heart. It doesn't matter how many years go by; there is always a missing part of you.

There are days you smile when you think about your child, but there are also days a tear will roll down your cheek out of nowhere.

You may be going along, and all of a sudden, you have an overwhelming, lonely feeling you can't explain.

When your child's birthday or the day they died comes along, your broken heart is more evident. Your feelings are right on edge.

Holidays or family get-togethers can be the same way. It's at those times that the sense that something isn't right is staring you in the face.

I know I am not alone with these feelings. I'm sure other people may feel the same way. It doesn't have to be your child, but a person you were very close to.

On these hard days, I have noticed God sends people who show His love in their kind words, actions, and even a tender hug when I need it. I call this a healing balm of love.

I've been blessed to have this balm of love pour into my broken heart at different times in my life, and I am thankful for it.

Does a broken heart ever heal? I'm not sure that it does, but I know that God will send a healing balm of love to help ease the pain through kind and loving people.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

169 ~ The Night Before

By Kay Heitsch

At 12:04 AM, Todd would be 54 years old had he lived. I couldn't help thinking about this today. If Todd had been born 5 minutes sooner, he would have been born on my Grandma's birthday.

I remember going to the hospital in labor. We lived in Ohio at the time. I was 21 years old. I was supposed to have a semi-private room, but they were all taken. I was put in a ward with a few other mothers.

One mother there told me she had no idea she was pregnant until she came to the hospital. I had never heard of this happening to anyone before, but I have since.

This mother was single, so she had decided to give her baby up for adoption. She asked me to go down and see if I could catch a glimpse of her baby. I saw a baby in a room separate from the other babies. I figured that might be her baby, but I wasn't sure.

I watched people come in and talk to this mother. I'm sure this must have been a difficult decision to make.

We never know what will happen in life from one day to the next.

We were blessed to have Todd in our lives. I'm sure whoever adopted this mother's baby was overjoyed to have a baby of their own.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

168 ~ The Game

By Kay Heitsch

I heard a story about the game Monopoly. I remembered playing the game many times in my life. Sometimes it was enjoyable, and at other times, it wasn't. Very much like life! It's not always fun!

When playing Monopoly, we all gather around the table and set up the board. Someone is the banker, and they hand out the money. As the game progresses, we can buy and sell properties.

It's a great feeling to own Boardwalk, Park Place, and trade in those tiny green houses for red hotels. Since the hotels were red, you know that's what I wanted.

As the game goes on, it's fun if you're the one buying the red hotels and winning the game. However, the game eventually comes to an end, and everything is put back in the box.

How true that is in life. It doesn't matter how much stuff we accumulate. We have no idea when the game will end, and it all goes back in the box, so to speak. It may be today for all we know. Like with Todd, his game ended much sooner than I thought.

I've learned a few things over the years. I know life is not about the stuff we have and all that we have attained.

I believe life is about relationships. Our relationship with ourselves, others, and, most importantly, our relationship with God, which is made possible because of what Jesus has done for us.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

167 ~ Always In A Hurry

By Kay Heitsch

The heartbreak of Todd dying broke my heart, but amazingly, with the help of the LORD, it fixed my vision. After his death, I began to see life in a completely different light.

Things that had been a priority in my life now seemed insignificant. I started to notice people and take my time to help them.

In the past, I was always in a big rush. Now life took on a different meaning.

One day, as I was getting out of the car to go to a store, I noticed an elderly man using a walker. As I got to the door, I heard him say, "Always in a hurry, they're always in a hurry! No one has time to help." I stopped! I gave him a smile and said, "I have time to help."

Somehow, those words, "Always in a hurry. They're always in a hurry. No one has time to help," really got my attention.

I can and have lived my life in a constant state of hurry. I'm grateful that the Lord helped me hear and see this man's need, and I stopped to help him for a moment.

There's a Bible verse that says, "Sometimes it takes a painful experience to make us change our ways." Proverbs 20:30 GNT

Unfortunately, sometimes it does take a painful experience to make us change our ways. But with the help of the LORD, we can be better for them.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

166 ~ One -Day

By Kay Heitsch

I've had a few one-day experiences that have changed my life forever.

I would have to say the worst one-day experience that changed my life forever was the death of our son, Todd.

If anyone has ever gone through the death of their child, I'm sure you would say the same.

However, as horrible as this day was, it marked the beginning of many one-day experiences that would start to change my life for the better.

I don't believe for one second that my life would have changed for the better had I not had another one-day experience.

It was on this day that I gave Todd and myself over to the LORD. On this day, I asked the LORD to use Todd's death for something positive, and if it was His will to use me, I was available.

One day after another, the LORD used Todd's death and me to bring many positive things out of Todd's death.

I love this Bible verse. "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." Romans 8:28

Was Todd's death good? No, but God used his death to bring good out of it after I turned it over to Him.

One day can change your life! Even on the most horrible day of your life, God can use it to bring something positive out of it.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2