175 ~ Recurring Nightmare

By Kay Heitsch

I was raised as an only child. My parent had me later in life. My Mom was 38, and my dad was 40 when I was born. For most of my life, some people thought my parents were my grandparents.

Maybe because of this, I don't know, but my Mom had a recurring nightmare that I was kidnapped. She would wake up very upset.

Mom had always taught me to be friendly with people, but because of these nightmares, I was also pretty aware of what was going on around me.

We lived about 2 or 3 blocks from downtown. The highway US 131 ran through the town. Almost daily, we walked to town. Sometimes I would go alone to pick up bread or something we needed, but my Mom and I often walked together.

It was fun to see people that we knew in town. My aunt worked at the insurance company, so we usually stopped in to say, "HI." On the office counter was an iron that had melted from being left on too long. I'll never forget that! It was there to remind people to unplug the iron.

One day, when I was around 10, my Mom asked me to go to town and buy something. I was on my way home when a car, with a man at the wheel and a woman in the passenger seat, stopped. The woman rolled down her window and asked me to come over to the car because they wanted to ask me something.

I felt fear run through my body! I don't know if it was from my Mom's recurring nightmare or what. I turned around and ran back towards town and went into the closest store. I told them what had happened. The shop owner ran out, but the car was gone.

This happened to me twice as a child. As most of you can tell, I'm very friendly and I was as a child too. I genuinely believe the Lord helped me know that these people were up to no good. Maybe my Mom's recurring nightmares enabled me to be aware, too.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

174 ~ She Can't Be Real

By Kay Heitsch

When the holidays roll around, special people who are no longer with us come to mind.

This year, I can't help but think of Aunt Carmeleta. I spend a lot of Thanksgivings with her and Uncle Fred.

I remember the first time Bill met Aunt Carmeleta. He said, "She can't be real!" But she was real. Bill had never met anyone so kind, loving, and full of mercy as Aunt Carmeleta.

I was blessed to have Aunt Carmeleta in my life. She always accepted me for who I was and would say, "Keep being yourself." I'm sure she saw many areas I could improve, but she let me be me.

I will miss Aunt Carmeleta this year, but she will always be close to my heart.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

173 ~ Survivor

By Kay Heitsch

Last night we were watching Survivor. One of the players had not won any challenges, so he hadn't eaten any real food for 16 days.

However, I assume he was eating coconuts and other things he could find. I don't think they let people starve on the show.

After the day's competition, he lost again. However, another contestant who had won offered him her reward. She said he could go in her place and have the reward of food.

At first, this guy refused to take the gift offered. He said he wanted to earn it. He didn't feel right taking a free gift. Finally, he did accept the reward of food.

I couldn't help but think of the free gift Jesus offers each of us. The free gift is offered, but we have to accept it.

Maybe this guy thinks there will be strings attached to accepting this gift on Survivor.

However, there are no strings attached to the free gift Jesus offers each of us. We simply believe that what Jesus did on the cross was good enough for us.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

172 ~ Comfort Zone

 By Kay Heitsch

I've met some interesting people in my life who have been through some situations that took them out of their comfort zones.

One guy I met told me that after he had a heart attack, he saw life in a totally different way. He said he started noticing things he had never paid attention to before.

I certainly remember how I saw life in a new way after Todd died. It seems strange how, after we are taken out of our comfort zones, we somehow have our eyes opened to what's really important.

I don't like being taken out of my comfort zone, but I've learned that even when I am, God has a way of opening my eyes to things I've never noticed before.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

171 ~ Sowing and Reaping

By Kay Heitsch

Yesterday, I was certainly reaping encouragement as I received so many loving reactions and comments on Todd's Heavenly Birthday. Thank you so very much.

I thought about sowing and reaping when I remembered going to one of Eli's baseball games. I guess I was sowing that day.

I was really excited watching the baseball game. It didn't matter to me who was up to bat or out in the field. I found myself yelling, "Good eye," "What a catch," "Great swing," "Wow, what a hit!" etc., etc.

As I was all into the game, a lady looked over at me and asked, "Are you with our team?" I looked over at our daughter, Shannon, and asked her, "Are we with this woman's team?" Shannon grinned and shook her head, "No."

I smiled and answered the lady, "I guess not, but you have to know me; I like to give encouragement to all of the kids."

I can see I was sowing encouragement that day, and now yesterday I was reaping encouragement.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

170 ~ Healing Balm of Love

By Kay Heitsch

When your child dies, you live with a broken heart. It doesn't matter how many years go by; there is always a missing part of you.

There are days you smile when you think about your child, but there are also days a tear will roll down your cheek out of nowhere.

You may be going along, and all of a sudden, you have an overwhelming, lonely feeling you can't explain.

When your child's birthday or the day they died comes along, your broken heart is more evident. Your feelings are right on edge.

Holidays or family get-togethers can be the same way. It's at those times that the sense that something isn't right is staring you in the face.

I know I am not alone with these feelings. I'm sure other people may feel the same way. It doesn't have to be your child, but a person you were very close to.

On these hard days, I have noticed God sends people who show His love in their kind words, actions, and even a tender hug when I need it. I call this a healing balm of love.

I've been blessed to have this balm of love pour into my broken heart at different times in my life, and I am thankful for it.

Does a broken heart ever heal? I'm not sure that it does, but I know that God will send a healing balm of love to help ease the pain through kind and loving people.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2

169 ~ The Night Before

By Kay Heitsch

At 12:04 AM, Todd would be 54 years old had he lived. I couldn't help thinking about this today. If Todd had been born 5 minutes sooner, he would have been born on my Grandma's birthday.

I remember going to the hospital in labor. We lived in Ohio at the time. I was 21 years old. I was supposed to have a semi-private room, but they were all taken. I was put in a ward with a few other mothers.

One mother there told me she had no idea she was pregnant until she came to the hospital. I had never heard of this happening to anyone before, but I have since.

This mother was single, so she had decided to give her baby up for adoption. She asked me to go down and see if I could catch a glimpse of her baby. I saw a baby in a room separate from the other babies. I figured that might be her baby, but I wasn't sure.

I watched people come in and talk to this mother. I'm sure this must have been a difficult decision to make.

We never know what will happen in life from one day to the next.

We were blessed to have Todd in our lives. I'm sure whoever adopted this mother's baby was overjoyed to have a baby of their own.

Remember how I led you on this long journey. Deuteronomy 8:2